Just pay attention

I rarely listen to the radio anymore. I really dislike the majority of what is called music right now and I can't stand ten straight minutes of commercials. When I do listen, it's to hear the Friday song on Connecticut's home of Rock 'n Roll, i-95. However, last night I had the radio on. I'll tune in if I know that there are going to be 80s songs, which are now referred to as Oldies; or if there are ACTUAL Oldies but Goodies on. I tuned in during an all-request Love Songs hour. Bleah. I generally don't like Love Songs, they're for the most part trite and way too long. But, the caller on the line had an interesting story. She explained that she was "very much in love" and engaged to "the love of her life". She was so happy. However neither her nor his parents approved. You see, she's white, he's black, the parents are all racist. She went on to say that they loved each other and they were getting married with or without parental approval (good for them) and then asked for a song. She did not specify which song she wanted to hear. She left it up to the professionals. Usually, Radio DJs seem to know what they're doing, but not so much last night. What did this Disc Jockey choose to play? Carly Simon's That's the Way I've Always Heard it Should Be. What?! That song is horribly inappropriate for the situation.

The song is about a woman. She lives with her parents and is being pressured to marry her boyfriend. Her friends are all married, they have children and they are HATING it! She wants a career, a life of her own. She wants to really know who she is and where she's going before she settles down. When Carly Simon wrote and recorded it, it was met with HUGE praise. She was saying something that a lot of women had been afraid to say for a long time. She was saying it during the women's movement. She was heralded as a saviour for women. I'm not making this up. But because it's "about" marriage, DJ Man played it for the future Mr. and Mrs. Dis-owned.

I'm not angry about this, that would be pathetic. However I am a little irritated by it. Does no one listen to ANYTHING anymore?

By the way, I've included the lyrics so you can see for yourself how great the song is.

My father sits at night with no lights on
His cigarette glows in the dark.
The living room is still;
I walk by, no remark.
I tiptoe past the master bedroom where
My mother reads her magazines.
I hear her call sweet dreams,
But I forgot how to dream.

But you say it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me -
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be:
You want to marry me, we'll marry.

My friends from college they're all married now;
They have their houses and their lawns.
They have their silent noons,
Tearful nights, angry dawns.
Their children hate them for the things they're not;
They hate themselves for what they are-
And yet they drink, they laugh,
Close the wound, hide the scar.

But you say it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me -
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be:
You want to marry me, we'll marry.

You say we can keep our love alive
Babe - all I know is what I see -
The couples cling and claw
And drown in Love's debris.
You say we'll soar like two birds through the clouds,
But soon you'll cage me on your shelf -
I'll never learn to be just me first
By myself.

Well O.K., it's time we moved in together
And raised a family of our own, you and me -
Well, that's the way I've always heard it should be,
You want to marry me, we'll marry,
We'll marry.

It's heartbreaking actually. To listen to it, it sounds like she's giving in, but just to read it, it seems a lot stronger.